Watch the BUT...

I have been thinking about something for weeks now, which plays off the theme that Karen brought up in her 4/19/07 post about 'chasing comfort with money' (kudos Karen!) I have been noticing my own (and others') tendency to qualify any contentment and gratitude with "..., BUT [followed by a statement about what ISN'T YET RIGHT and could still be better]."

It's really quite uncanny - even in the solitude of my own mental conversations with myself, I seek to moderate my attention toward what is not quite right, or what is still a "work in progress" as to my experience in the moment... Just a matter of minutes ago, I was very happily watching an episode of Oprah from the DVR, but rather than simply enjoy it for 30 minutes as I had planned to, even though everything was fine, and there were no pressing issues, I couldn't stop myself from feeling guilty about the "to do" list which was still "to be done". Or, there is just that little hint of a sinus headache that whispers more concretely than the sound of an old friend's voice on the phone. Even when an accomplishment is finally achieved, my mind is instantaneously 'on to the next thing' without a mere moment to savor the joy of "what is" now.

So, for myself, I am starting to watch my own "but"...

Every time I answer: "Things are pretty good, but..."
Every time I feel or say: "I'm feeling okay, but..."
Every time I hold back my own contentment with the thought: "..., BUT the this, or the that, or the whatever, isn't right / done / fixed / finished / certain yet!"

Why can't I seem to notice, and just be perfectly fine with exactly "what is" right now - enjoy it if it is good, and know that it will pass if it's not - without the stress and anxiety of trying to MAKE the next (ostensibly even better) experience occur immediately??!

What is it that makes it SO EASY to focus on what isn't fantastic yet (and then give power to that which I don't want) by verbalizing it or even thinking about it?

Is it the "don't count your chickens before they're hatched" syndrome?

Resistance.

Resistance is the problem... Resisting what IS. Resisting the acceptance of my immediate experience as perfect the way it is - however it is. (Or maybe, in my case, INSISTING that what it IS, is NOT quite what I want... (and subtly refusing to acknowledge what IS good about it because it is not exactly what I want??)

Unfortunately, the Law of Attraction tells us that what we focus on expands; that that which is likened unto itself is drawn -- that like attracts like. Therefore, my attention on what is "not quite right yet" is creating more of the same -- an experience of "not quite right yet"!

Perhaps what I really should be asking myself is: "What is this trying to teach me?", or "What is good about this?" What I REALLY should be asking myself is: "What do I want to experience instead??!! ...And WHY??!!" "Why" is the most important question, because the answer to it is the FUEL for the creation of what your attention is on. The Universe doesn't care if the energy and emotion is positive or negative, it only draws on the intensity of it, and seeks to manifest more of the subject on which your emotion is strong.

What do I want to feel instead of guilt for watching a favorite program? I want to feel relaxed, happy, content that I have scheduled a little "guilty pleasure" time for myself, open to inspiration from anything that pleasurably holds my attention... WHY? Because I want to feel good, I really like watching that show, I want to feel peaceful, happy, and grateful that I can take that time for myself to do something I enjoy... Suddenly the guilt and tension seem to wash a way a bit, and give way to inspiration, happiness, and a clear consciousness about the "bigger picture" reasons that are (at least partially) behind my actions and choices, and peace. Suddenly I am feeling more of what I want to feel - simply by asking myself what I want to feel and why.

Perhaps there is something to this "Law of Attraction stuff" after all! ;-)

So, watch your own "but..." When you catch yourself saying, thinking, or noticing it - begin to acknowledge what you do like about your current experience, as well as what you may ALSO be wishing to experience instead, and WHY!

(BUT beware: By interrupting the pattern, you will cease the creation of "more of the same" and start moving more quickly toward your inner hearts' desires (even if that desire is a smaller but (derriere!))